Anymore

Also wrote this a while back and decided to post it. And yes, it IS a rap song (I guess….)

I’m up late again. Feeling like I can’t win.
I should be studying something.
Who knows what subject this time, they all seem like a waste of mine. Anymore.
Haven’t cried yet. Not gonna bet, yet.
Tears don’t seem like they stream,
As easily as they used to. The well runs dry even when I’m blue. Anymore.

That Square State, is looking so great.
Square in shape but not in my heart.
All four sides hold in my past, but my present and future? I don’t ask. Anymore.
Hearing from my dad, that sure made me glad.
I almost fell to tears, but not apart.
He offers prayers and comfort, Grandpa’s heart might not hurt. Anymore.

Anymore. I feel outta place.
Can’t quite fit the mold,
Anymore. Living so fast paced.
Future mostly uncontrolled,
Anymore.

Up late again. Such is common. Anymore.
Open my book. Take one look, but I’m so shook,
Anymore. I can’t focus with so much mess.

Songs will play one last time in my head,
Before I finally succumb to bed,
And into dreams of a life I dread.
Do I swim the way, or simply tread,
Anymore?

Shine

(Who is your light?)
You are my, hope and inspiration.
I can not, imagine life without,
You’re smile and, calm determination.
I love how, you’re never down and out.
You’ve shown me ways, I couldn’t see,
When the path was blocked with monotony.
When times were hard, back in the past,
You helped me through and so I ask. . .

Did you know that you’re my light?
Whenever darkness falls on me!
You always shine so bright,
When I’ve dropped down to my knees!
And so I send this promise,
When your task is tough to do,
You said that you’d be there for me,
So I’ll be there for you.
My life is, full and complicated.
Sometimes I, don’t have time to call.
I realize, at night alone in my bed,
Without you, I have no life at all.

You’ve shown with, optimistic words just
How green the, grass is up ahead.
You bring me, back to the present because,
My own grass, is green and also blessed.
You’ve shown me ways, I couldn’t see,
When the path was blocked with monotony.
When times were hard, back in the past,
You helped me through and so I ask. . .

Did you know that you’re my light?
Whenever darkness falls on me!
You always shine so bright,
When I’ve dropped down to my knees!
And so I send this promise,
When your task is tough to do,
You said that you’d be there for me,
So I’ll be there for you.

You are my, hope and inspiration,
My light when, others cannot see. . .

Count Me Out

(This is about my high school superintendent and school board. We were SO frustrated with them my senior year. We tried (and succeeded?) to really let them know how we felt too. This is a song-rant i wrote after he pissed me off haha. The strange sentence breaks and commas were how I wrote it to sound with the music I had in my head. Weird.)

I know it sounds cliche, but let the
Chips fall where they may, and we can
Make them go away! That’s what I say!
We’re fallin’ in a hole, it feels like
Life’s out of control, but you
Know you bought the role! Just pay the toll!
You seem to think, We’re outta touch.
You seem to think, You know so much.
We seem to think, You are a crutch.
You hit the brakes, but forgot the clutch!

Don’t count me in, your twisted plans,
Please don’t begin, I’m not a fan!
Master of spin, Without a doubt!
I don’t want in, Just count me out!
Count me out!

My mind is on vacation, and I’ve lost
My motivation, for the strain
Of education. I’ll take donations!

All these titles that I’m wearin’, have me
Endlessly despairin’, while my
Temper keeps on flarin’. Just quit starin’!
You seem to think, We’re outta touch.
You seem to think, You know so much.
We seem to think, You are a crutch.
You hit the brakes, but forgot the clutch!

Don’t count me in, your twisted plans,
Please don’t begin, I’m not a fan!
Master of spin, Without a doubt!
I don’t want in, Just count me out!
Count me out!

This Too Shall Pass

(I like this one quite a bit. . .)

Hold your head up high my son.
I’ll send my angels to fly as one,
To your side this eve. Be calm, young one.
You know I’ll always be here,
I’m never gone!

This too shall pass.
Though only one set is seen in the sand,
I’m carrying you through the hardest of times,
Please give me your hand and you’ll be just fine.

You are my rock and my shield, Jesus,
In who else shall I place my trust?
The weight of the world is pushing me down.
Yet if I simply believe,
I can move any mound.

This too shall pass.
Though I see only one set of prints in the sand.
You’re carrying me through these hardest of times.
I’ll give you my hand, and I know I’ll be fine!

St. Peter stands smiling mere steps ahead,
I look back down at those ’round my bed.
“He sent those angels when to Heaven you cried.”
Peter said with a grin before taking me inside.

This too shall pass.
Though only one set you can see in the sand.
He’ll carry you through the hardest of times.
Just give him your hand, and you’ll be just fine.

Vengeful

I’m pissed. I am angry. I’m upset. I am mad.
Yet I’m down. I’m depressed. I’m confused, and I’m sad.
You treated me like a child,
Like you had to hold my hand.
You lied right to my face,
And now I wanna get it back!

I’m vengeful!
Draw the line and take up sides.
I’m vengeful!
Please Lord, take this from my mind.
I’m having all these thoughts,
That I know can never be.
And all I’m asking now,
Is the truth to set me free!

You lied, and you left me. You wasted all my time.
Yet I still believe. . . Your words in every line.
Even your good friends ell me,
I should give in. Pack up. Move on.
But I can’t seem to do it,
So I’ll just think of you till dawn.

I’m vengeful!
Draw the line and take up sides.
I’m vengeful!
Please Lord, take this from my mind.
I’m having all these thoughts,
That I know can never be.
And all I’m asking now,
Is the truth to set me free!

Can’t Wait

(I do remember this one. It was the night before I left for school. Ah… looking back. I really was optimistic wasn’t I?)

Up Late, can’t wait.
Time to be moving on.
Don’t doubt, Pen out.
Can’t hide my feelings, will I be strong?

Pen up, Brain’s stuck.
Could I truly write it down?
Here it goes, Hope it flows.
End on the ceiling, or on the ground.

How do you spell anxiety?
And what word rhymes with fun?
I need a phrase for complicated,
“Walk it off” is overrated. . .
The issue’s not one of simplicity,
It will make sense when I’m done.

Stakes high, Pen’s dry.
Changing live sure takes time.
Goodbyes, Mom cries.
My mind’s still reeling, oh and I’m. . .

Questioning myself,    Yes, I’m
Wrestling with the doubt.
I’ve got a dinner date with fate,
I have crossed the airport gate,    and
Those jet’s don’t stop for “Wait!”
It almost seems too late. . .

How do you spell anxiety?
And what word rhymes with fun?
I need a phrase for complicated,
“Walk it off” is overrated. . .
The issue’s not one of simplicity,
It will make sense when I’m done.

Pen rests, Confessed.
Stress is gone at last.
Class test, Feel blessed.
True thoughts revealing, I just wanna have a blast!

How do you spell anxiety?
And what word rhymes with fun?
I need a phrase for complicated,
“Walk it off” is overrated. . .
The issue’s not one of simplicity,
It will make sense when   I’m   done.

Up late, can’t wait.
Time to be moving on. . .